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Touhou Nekokayou #95: Touhou Saisoutensoku #2: Icy You

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Touhou Nekokayou: Scarlet Weather Archive in Japanese Red #95

Touhou Nekokayou: Scarlet Weather Archive in Japanese Red #95a

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Characters: Cirno, Sanae Kotiya, Hong Meiling, Rin Satsuki, Marisa Kirisame, Alice Margatroid, Utsuho Reiuji

東方再想天則 〜 Rethinking the Natural Law (Touhou 12.3i) begins here. Oh dear, what is this? That's not Cirno in the logo! Who could that be!? (Can you tell I was just making things up as I went along last week and have now latched onto an actual course this time around?)

Cirno's "Everybody got that?" is a reference to the opening scenes of Spaceballs, in which Colonel Sandurz basically exposits the villains' plan to Dark Helmet, who then turns to the camera and says the line.

It has come to my attention (by way of a video with a slow-motion replay) that in actuality, Cirno specifically smash puny weakling with glacier-mallet. I guess the version she used in #80 was a prototype, or something. The "Spell Card portrait is more accurate to Cirno's ingame appearance than what she's generally looks like in the comic" is just me goofing off, I guess.

I kind of had to speed over the fight with Meiling. Otherwise the comic would have gotten even more too-long than it was already. And then it looks like we're not going to get the fight with Alice and her Goliath Doll, oh well!

But now we have it, ladies and gentlechen: Cirno x Utsuho! I guess I really don't have to say anything else about that.

I've come up with a rather elaborate backstory for Rin Satsuki in my personal continuity, but for now, I'm just going to be maddeningly vague about it. Her themesong is a not-quite-Tasofro-sounding remix of "Strange Bird of the Moon, Illusion of Mysterious Cat" from Ghostly Field Club. Her weather-effect is "The Calm Before The Storm," which halves the damage of all attacks and effects except Spell Cards and maximum-level specials, which have a damage boost. Of course, that's left for Arcade Mode, and she hasn't actually fought yet, has she?

The pun in the last panel is the strongest.

On 24 January 2010, I updated panel 17 to have Alice's house instead of Marisa's (since create.swf didn't have an updated Alice's House when I made this).

Transcript

  1. (The giant shadow looms over the trees. Cirno gazes at it in the foreground.)
    SFX: LOOOOOOM
  2. (Cirno is standing by the lake.)
    Cirno: That big thingy must be the legendary giant, Daidarabotchi! If I defeat him, everyone will recognize me as the strongest! (aside) Everybody got that?
  3. (Sanae floats in; Cirno flinches back in a panic.)
    Sanae: Excuse me ...
    Cirno: N-NO I DIDN'T SEE A DAIDARABOTCHI!
  4. Sanae: (skeptical) A what?
    Cirno: Um, n-nothing, I definitely didn't see any big shadows anywhere.
    Sanae: ... You're plotting something and making Brocken spectres in the fog, aren't you?
    Cirno: A what?
  5. (Both of them rise up from the ground.)
    Sanae: (darkly) I'll have to punish you!
    Cirno: (hyper) Aha! It's a fight you want!
  6. (A ghostly Spell Card image of Sanae appears (her portrait from Touhou 12.3), and she begins launching danmaku out; Cirno panics.)
    Sanae: (grinning monstrously) *And* I've been learning from Reimu!
    Spell Card: Hax Sign 「Miraculous Victory」
    Cirno: W-W-W-WHA WHAAAAAA!?
  7. (A ghostly Spell Card image of Cirno appears; Cirno smashes puny shrine maiden with glacier-mallet.)
    Cirno: AAAAAAAAAAA CIRNO SMASH PUNY SHRINE MAIDEN WITH GLACIER MALLET!!
    Spell Card: Ice Mass 「Great Crusher」
    SFX: KA-CHUNGA
  8. (Cirno flies off at top speed as the mallet shatters, throwing Sanae for a loop. Powerup-items and shards of ice fly all over everywhere.)
    Cirno: Wheee!
    SFX: SHATTER
    SFX: SPOOOOOOOOOON
  9. (Cirno flies along against a speedlines-background.)
    Cirno: I AM THE STRONGEST! I have defeated that one shrine maiden! Nothing can stand in my way, wahahahahaha!
  10. (She comes to a screeching halt in midair in front of Meiling at the SDM's gate.)
    Meiling: SLOW DOWN, YOU'RE ABOUT TO CRASH INTO THE SCARLET DEVIL MANSION!
    Cirno: Wah!
    SFX: screeeeee
  11. (Cirno postures.)
    Cirno: Bah, I'm just feeling *great* today! Cirno has too much POWER!
    Meiling: I could help you unwind with a little duel, if you want ...
  12. (Cirno launches random-ish danmaku out; Meiling gets knocked around through them.)
    Cirno: You could say that this idea ... is perfect!
    Spell Card: Freeze Sign 「Perfect Freeze」
    Meiling: Ack! Wha -- ow! Oof!
    SFX: bonk
    SFX: whack
  13. (With the bullets dissipating, Cirno hesitates and looks around. Meiling falls while spewing powerup-items.)
    Cirno: Um ... hang on ... what was I looking around for again?
    SFX: SPOOOOOOOOOON
  14. (Cirno looks up and sees the looming shadow. Meiling is upside-down, next to her.)
    SFX: LOOOOOOM
    Cirno: Oh, right.
    Meiling: ... ow ...
  15. (Cirno flies away from the mildly-bruised Meiling.)
    Cirno: DAIDARABOTCHI!
    Meiling: Oof ... that's probably one of the weirdest losses I've taken in a while ...
    SFX: I mean, *that* ice-fairy!?
  16. (Elsewhere, by a crater in a rocky landscape, Rin Satsuki flies down from above.)
    Rin: Hmm ... no sign of the witch? I wonder where she's gone.
  17. (At Alice's house, Alice and Marisa are regarding a giant dual-sword-wielding doll, which is on fire.)
    Marisa: Sixty seconds before it blew up ... That's a new record, I think ...
    Alice: (annoyed sweatdrop) sigh ...
  18. (Cirno flies up to Rin.)
    Cirno: Um, hey ...
    Rin: (cheerfully) Oh, my! You seem to be the strongest fairy I've ever seen!
  19. (Cirno straightens up. Rin gets a sly look.)
    Cirno: Hah! Yes! I am the strongest! Would you happen to have seen a Daidarabotchi around!?
    Rin: Hmm ... Well ... I think you ought to search in the Geyser Underground Center here.
    Cirno: Yes! Okay!
    Cirno SFX: puffing up with pride
  20. Narration Box: So, y'know, "and so" and all that kind of stuff, right.
    (Cirno descends to the nuclear reactor.)
    Cirno: Wha ... it's hot down here!
  21. (Cirno narrowly dodges as Utsuho suddenly appears and fires a blast from her arm-cannon.)
    Cirno: Yeek!
    Utsuho: Intruder detected! Must eliminate contamination!
  22. (Utsuho fires a miniature sun; Cirno ducks under it, brandishing an ice-sword.)
    Utsuho: Ha!
    SFX: THOOM
    Cirno: This isn't okay in the duel rules!!
    Sword SFX: Chingappear!
  23. (Cirno flies up, sword brandished, going on the offensive, as the miniature sun hits the far wall.)
    Cirno: AAAAAA!
    Utsuho: HAAA!
  24. (Closeup as they collide in midair with their lips pressed together, against a background of hearts and ⑨s. The ice-sword goes flying.)

All Touhou characters are © Team Shanghai Alice and/or ZUN; create.swf is ⑨ KirbyM with help from Thefre. "Sakura petals" brush in main/4koma logo was made by Kisara Girl. "Falling leaves" brush in 60-Years logo came with Photoshop.

18 Comments (auto-closed) (rss feed)

RozenMariku

Ya know, if this were the 96th comic, that last panel would've fit.

And is that silhouette Meimu or somebody?

Raymoo

Now I'm kind of curious about your personal-continuity backstory for Rin. Will it be elaborated upon in the comic at some point?

And yeah, that's Meimu. And now I have a ton of random theories about how this arc will end.

CapedLuigisYoshi

It's okay, Muffin. Some of the greatest webcomic authors made up things as they went along.

I'm sure that's Meimu, but... I don't even know who she is. And here we have Rin Satsuki, yayz.

When I saw this comic's TVTropes entry on Crack Pairings, I didn't think you were actually going to seriously go for Cirno x Utsuho. But whatever...

sRc

oh, that's supposed to be Rin? I was like "wait... who that?"

Kimiko Muffin

@Raymoo: Oh, sure. A little bit here, a little bit there, a whammy that's going to show up in one of the fanfics, y'know, that sort of thing.

Why don't you share some of these theories. :3

@CapedLuigisYoshi: I suppose that depends on what you mean by "serious." It is going to be almost entirely played for laughs. ;)

Raymoo

/ Modified by Kimiko Muffin:

@Kimiko: Oh dear. Some of them are pretty weird, but I'll try to keep it intra-continuity.

1. Hisoutensoku is one (or multiple, but not at the same time) of Alice's Goliath dolls, which everyone mistook for a giant robot/Daidarabotchi/Taisui Xingjun. Meimu is a blatant red herring.
2. Hisoutensoku is Meimu. The supposed Moriya Shrine conspiracy was actually caused by Yukari fooling around again, and Reimu calls out Yukari and Suwako for it, since templates like that are forbidden.
3. Hisoutensoku actually is a giant robot. Then Sanae summons Guncannon!Kanako and they duel whilst flying high above Gensokyo. @D
4. The whole thing is a giant Xanatos Gambit courtesy of Rin. I don't know how, but it just is. [fixed by Muffin!] She's purposely stroking Cirno's Hisoutensoku-sized ego so Cirno will charge headfirst into Utsuho's lair and get a miniature sun to the face. I mean, just look at that devious expression in Panel 19.
5. This is one of those steganography things again, which I can't figure out for the life of me. D:

I probably have better things to do than coming up with nutty theories about works of fiction, but at least I find it entertaining.

Kimiko Muffin

No, no steganography this time. If I want people running around like chickens with their heads cut off looking for it, I'll say it's there. Nor do I go for the "SUGGESTING A CHARACTER WHO NEVER ACTUALLY APPEARS!"-level of red herrings. (Speaking of which, there's another reason not to take Rin's comment at face-value. Notice how she worded things in the aforementioned panel.)

Also, keep in mind that my "changes" to the storyline are mostly smallish, personal-level things. Well, okay, Marisa marrying Alice sometime in the future is big, as far as that goes (I'm not counting "Marisa becomes a youkai," because ZUN keeps implying that this is going to happen anyway), but what I mean is that I'm changing the effect and the course, not the cause.

CapedLuigisYoshi

Yup, I suspected that Rin was being suspicious. (Now I predict a "Just as Planned" face from her in this series.) No clue what's up, though.

And you say that you only make small changes, but you have Kaguya and Mokou as lovers, which is... well, quite canon-defying. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but...

Kimiko Muffin

Well, as I said, I meant in terms of "as opposed to changing the entire reason the UFOs are showing up." The Incidents are the same; the resolutions aren't. Shipping Mokou and Kaguya doesn't affect the plot of the games, to speak of. Besides, Mokou's a total tsundere in Inabas.

Raymoo

Ah, I hoped that wasn't a red herring. I never claimed my theories were sane, at the very least. XD;

The Jelly

Wow. Just, wow. And I thought the puns on the "This Is A Drill" page on TVT were bad. That one snuk past me until I read that there was one... And then it's just... *groan*

Hmmm, so now we 'officially' have two nurse-types in this world (since you tend to follow canon for things like that)... Why am I sensing some sort of doctor/nurse setup with Rin and Eirin, one of which doing so to run a particularly mad Xanatos gambit... O.o why am I now also sensing that Rin is going to live at a dam?

Project_Mars

Is it me, or is the use of the onomatopoeia "SPOOOOON" a lot more hilarious when examined with a dirty mind?

Pardon me, i need to get my brain to chew some Orbitz gum now.

Joe4evr

Yup, I suspected that Rin was being suspicious. (Now I predict a "Just as Planned" face from her in this series.)

It's probably obvious, but: Keikaku dooRin!

Effex

...Cold Fusion?

Anonymous

...Go team 69?

RozenMariku

Of course, Muffin might make a twist and the silhouette could be someone else.

SoF

...Cold Fusion?

...Go team 69?

thatisthejoke.jpg (Muffin beat you both to the puns on the "Romantic Pairing List")

Of course, Muffin might make a twist and the silhouette could be someone else.

You just reminded me of this.

dan-heron

both have been pretty good, and both scenarios move pretty quickly. It's interesting seeing Marisa being somewhere else, and the Goliath Doll went gorilla, awwww.

So, since we have that silhouette there, will we be seeing her in Sanae's strip?