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Touhou Nekokayou #150: Fairy Wars Episode 6: The Vampire Strikes Back

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Touhou Nekokayou: Scarlet Weather Archive in Japanese Red #150

Touhou Nekokayou: Scarlet Weather Archive in Japanese Red #150a

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Characters: Cirno, The Three Boss-Fairies, Remilia Scarlet, Sakuya Izayoi

Much to apologizeding for the delay! Fairy Wars begins here, and is still not doing any actual Star Wars stuff besides "oh, hey, she said that thing the one guy said that one time!" and stuff. But it's not over yet, I still have to do Extra! I guess I'll have to start borrowing titles from the Thrawn trilogy. This is also comic #150, a number of no significance whatsoever. (Also I've stopped really trying to shoehorn seventeens in ... except, y'know, the titles.)

I've used the "Ready to lose?" "No, ready to win!" bit a couple of times now. I suppose it doesn't have to be that much of a "catchphrase" or whatever; it just seems like it's the kind of thing that these belligerent Touhous would say.

"Shoosh" and "pap" are sound effects from Homestuck, for those few of you who don't actually know this. They are almost universally paired with each other, both by the fans and in canon. "Doof" also appears, albeit more rarely.

I figured Cirno should actually have some sort of challenge at some point (prior to the extra stage, which is supposed to beat you over the head with its difficulty). However, I could not bring myself to have her actually succeed entirely on her own merits. This was just meant to be silliness and chaos from beginning to end, really!

In the Fairy Wars music-room and level-announcement, the final boss theme is displayed as "Faily Wars." This speaks for itself.

I couldn't decide which face Remilia should use in the last panel, so of course the answer is always "all four of them, by way of random comic-generation!" (I'd originally planned on including Trollface as a fifth one, but I basically just could not get it to look good. And it was originally just going to be Light Yagami and Awesome Face, but I decided to throw in the other two for good measure.)

Transcript

  1. (Cirno faces off against the Three Fairies.)
    Sunny Milk: So, last chance if you wanted to team up with us instead of fighting three-on-one!
    Star Sapphire: Yeah, the offer's still open!
    Luna Child: Uh-huh!
    Cirno: I'LL NEVER JOIN YOU! You knocked my house down!
  2. (Pre-battle interface, as before, with Cirno against the three fairies.)
    Text: SPELL CARD SET!
    Text: FINAL ROUND
    Sunny Milk: Oh, well, in that case, are you ready to lose!?
    Cirno: Nope! I'm ready to win! (aside) ... Say, is it just me, or have a bunch of people been saying that?
    Text: CIRNO: THE STRONGEST FAIRY VS SUNNY, STAR, & LUNA: THE FAIRIES OF LIGHT
  3. (Cirno leaps forward at them.)
    Sunny Milk: Then I guess we oughta -- what!?
    Cirno: BANZAI!
  4. (Great big cloud-of-violence covering the whole panel, with danmaku stars, oblongs, ice-crystals, and lasers flying out.)
    SFX: CLANG
    SFX: BONK
    SFX: JANGLE
    SFX: SHOOSH
    SFX: DOINK
  5. (The cloud clears; the scene has shifted slightly to the left. Sunny Milk is trying to hold onto Cirno, who is launching ice-bullets in all directions. Star Sapphire is launching out star-bullets in a panic, and Luna Child is dazedly hovering off to one side.)
    Sunny Milk: Augh! Star, hit her!!
    Cirno: AAAGGHGHGAGHAGGHHHH
    Luna Child: Oof ...
    Star Sapphire: Aaaaahh!
  6. (A different cloud-of-violence, with danmaku crescents, cartoon-suns, and ice-swords flying out.)
    SFX: SMASH
    SFX: PAP
    SFX: MOON
    SFX: CRUNCH
    SFX: SPOOOOOOON
  7. (The cloud clears; the scene has shifted to the right. Star Sapphire and Luna Child are unconscious, while Cirno and Sunny Milk are staggering at each other on the ground.)
    Sunny Milk: But ... but we were ... oof ... supposed to b-be a cooperation thing ...
    Cirno: WHO THE HELL ... ow ... DO YOU THINK I ... AM ...!?
  8. (Cirno starts to keel over backwards, accidentally tossing her sword at Sunny Milk's face.)
    Cirno: Nighty-night, Mr. Weird Shop Guy ...
    SFX: toss
    Sunny Milk: (falling backward) GACK!
  9. (Victory scene against sketchy pink background, except with Cirno flat on her back.)
    Text: WINNER: CIRNO
    Cirno: B'duh!
    SFX: flop
  10. (Remilia flies into the scene, with Sakuya close behind.)
  11. (They float over the fallen fairies.)
    Remilia: Well, that was a nice few minutes' entertainment, wouldn't you say?
    Sakuya: I suppose it was, milady.
    Remilia: Hmm ...
  12. (Remilia examines the fairies.)
    Remilia: Okay, why don't we (forcibly) recruit them as maids! All except the ice-fairy, that is.
    Sakuya: Why not? Is it because she won the fairy wars?
  13. Remilia: More like "faily wars." Or do you honestly think they could have accomplished ... well, *anything*?
    Sakuya: Good point. I'll get Meiling to help me carry them ...
  14. Remilia: Lily White told me about their "game," by the way. It was all fairly stupid, really.
    Sakuya: Oh?
    Remilia: Yes, it's so cute when idiots try to make "cunning plans ..."
  15. Remilia: (glancing back down) Lots of pointless "must be at location X at the right time" ... *planning* on losing the first few fights ...
    Sakuya: ... an obsession with the number seventeen ...
  16. Remilia: Oh, yes, you were present for that part.
    Sakuya: Yes.
    Remilia: And in the end, the results of their whole scheme were ...
  17. (Closeup of Remilia with a Yukkuri face.)
    Text: NOT AS PLANNED!

All Touhou characters are © Team Shanghai Alice and/or ZUN; create.swf is ⑨ KirbyM with help from Thefre. "Sakura petals" brush in main/4koma logo was made by Kisara Girl. "Falling leaves" brush in 60-Years logo came with Photoshop.

29 Comments (auto-closed) (rss feed)

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Nyarly

Oh, and also good job in giving a piece of Engrish and actual meaning.

Henix Aurorus

EPIC FACE REMI GO

awesome

Khiash

Panel 15
Rght isn't a word, silly Remilia.
/grammarnazi

Dizzy H. Muffin

There I Fixed It. Also, semi-impolitely-phrased comment to you, too! ;P

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