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Touhou Nekokayou #50: A Maid's Work


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Touhou Nekokayou: Scarlet Weather Archive in Japanese Red #50

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Characters: Sakuya Izayoi, Remilia Scarlet, Flandre Scarlet, Koishi Komeiji

Making the wrecked background was the longest of the individual tasks for this comic, but, heh, positioning Sakuya and Remilia right when I expanded it was tricky.

I figured I should at least mention in the comic that I'm pairing Flandre and Koishi. (Maybe I should do something with Sakuya/Meiling and Patchouli/Koakuma as well ...) I will leave the exact details of Koishi's drinking contest to your imagination, where it will be more outrageous than anything I could come up with.

This is a parody of "Unlimited Blade Works" from, uh, Fate/Stay Night. I don't know anything about it beyond the fact that it is awesome. (Another tricky bit was coming up with enough poses for her during her speech, since you really don't have a whole lot of choices in create.swf ...) Here is the Unlimited Maid Works background; if you wanna use it, feel free, though it'd be nice if you gave me some kind of credit.


  1. (Sakuya and Remilia are standing in a wrecked hall in the SDM, staring.)
    Sakuya: ..........
  2. Remilia: I thought Flandre was supposed to be *less* violent now that she's, uh, going out with Koishi.
    Sakuya: We shouldn't have let either of them touch any alcohol, let alone that oni's. At least they didn't hurt anyone before they passed out ...
  3. (Flandre and Koishi are lying on the floor of the SDM's basement, hung over.)
    Flandre: Owies ... Oneesama threw us both into the basement ...
    Koishi: Ooof ... I'm sorry I overloaded your subconscious and made you go nuts ...
    Flandre: I'm sorry I went nuts ...
    Koishi: I'll never get into a drinking contest again, even if someone says they're better than me about alcohol ...
  4. (Sakuya and Remilia are still in the broken hall.)
    Sakuya: Mistress ... In order to clean this up, I'm going to have to use "that."
    Remilia: Ahh ... You have my permission to unlock that ability, then.
  5. (Remilia flies away.)
    Sakuya: Right, then ...
  6. (Sakuya leaps into the air.)
    Sakuya: (red text) I am the bone of my broom.
  7. Sakuya: Soap is my body, and bleach is my blood.
  8. (Sakuya affects the Dio Brando pose as a red aura surrounds her.)
    Sakuya: Unknown to master, nor known to guest ...
  9. (The aura expands and time is stopped in the room.)
    Sakuya: ... have withstood pain to clean many surfaces.
  10. (The room turns yellow.)
    Sakuya: So ... As I pray ...
  11. (The room turns into a parody of "Unlimited Blade Works", sporting watches and brooms in the background.)
  12. Text: ......
  13. (Remilia and Sakuya are back in the hall, which is totally repaired.)
    Remilia: Excellent work, Sakuya!
    Sakuya: (grinning) Thank you, Mistress.
    Remilia: You truly are the most perfect and elegant maid ... who works.

The Fiftieth Comic

So, the big five-oh. I guess this is the point at which I mention that I wasn't honestly expecting I'd make this many comics. But now, I can at least imagine creating the 200th comic. This will probably take ... well, about two or three years, maybe. With that many, the sidebar would be longer than the comic itself! Will I still be interested by then? What will the comic's popularity be like? Will I have brought Perfect Square and A Different Story of an Eastern Wonderland anywhere near a satisfactory conclusion? How about Ends and Beginnings? Who knows! We've got a while to find out!

Scott Adams (the creator of Dilbert) once passed on this bit of sage advice: if everyone merely likes a particular story/product/whatever, it will probably fail. If you invent (say) an entirely new kind of mousetrap, if everyone only likes it, they'll say "Oh, that's interesting" at best, might not actually buy/commit to it, and then get whatever's the most convenient for them when they actually need one, and it probably won't be what you created. You know you're onto something if you get someone who loves it, and is willing to buy a dozen of your new mousetraps for his whole family and another dozen for himself, and give each of them names.

Or, for another example, if someone is willing to stay up until 3 AM trawling through the archives of your webcomic. Someone recently told me he'd done that with Scarlet Weather Archive. He said he loved it, that he'd gone almost all the way through them at that point, that he thought it was really funny; I thought of the above concepts and thought "Hmmm ... Oh wow." Of course, in his next message, he told me that what he was really a fan of was Touhou, and that he was always looking for new doujins and fanfics and comics like that. This was ... a bit of a disappointment, I guess.1

But y'know what? I don't care all that much. I'm mostly making this just for my own amusement, and that of my relatively small circle of friends who also like Touhou. I-It's not like I'm doing it for YOU! I'd like if it were even one-eighth as successful as e.g. Walfas, but I know I shouldn't realistically expect it to. Nor do I seriously want to deal with, er, all the problems associated with that kind of popularity, either. I can only imagine how ZUN himself must feel, although at least he doesn't have to create and managing the CMS of the website through which he presents his own ... ah ... unlimited (shrine) maid(en) works ...

1The real sign of my success will be when I start seeing fanart of Mika, Midori, and Satsuki. Or if people other than myself start linking to it from TVTropes ...

All Touhou characters are © Team Shanghai Alice and/or ZUN; create.swf is ⑨ KirbyM with help from Thefre. "Sakura petals" brush in main/4koma logo was made by Kisara Girl. "Falling leaves" brush in 60-Years logo came with Photoshop.

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You just had to remind me of my abandoned Fate/Touhou crossover.



This is an ancient comic, but I feel obligated to nitpick that you're missing a line in the incantation. Blame me sitting on TV Tropes for the past five hours of absolute boredom. >_>

Regardless, this is still rather humorous

Dizzy H. Muffin

I know, I forgot to mention that elsewhere on this page. :<


I am the bone of my broom.
Soap is my body, and bleach is my blood.
I have wash over a thousand dishes.
Unknown to master, nor known to guest.
I have with stood pain, to clean many surfaces
Yet, these hands will never touch anything.

Spirit Tsunami

Yeah, funny, but the last panel is kind of...meh. It probably would've worked better with just the 11 panels.


I am BigB and I approve this shipping.
And I have to disagree with Tewi, I think the OCs give the comic some, how you say, originality.
Plus, I am one of the ones who love the comic! I also stayed up till 3 or 4 in the morning reading them all and searching your site. Lol


'Soap is my body, and bleach is my blood?' Well, that's Nightmare Fuel Squick right after I had pizza.

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