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Shenanigans in a Magical Forest

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MIMA: What!? Shameimaru ... what the hell!?

AYA: I have always wanted to say that!

MIMA: Aya Shameimaru, this is the most ridiculous thing you have ever done.

AYA: I'm over a millenium old. You shoulda seen me five hundred years ago!

MIMA: What.

MIMA: What!? Shameimaru ... what the hell!?

AYA: I have always wanted to say that!

MIMA: Aya Shameimaru, this is the most ridiculous thing you have ever done.

AYA: I'm over a millenium old. You shoulda seen me five hundred years ago!

MIMA: What.

As MIMA just insinuated, you are AYA SHAMEIMARU. Or possibly SYAMEIMARU. Romaji is FUCKED UP in some places. Congratulations, by the way, on not being MASHA for the first time in this entire adventure. Well ... except for that one time with that FAIRY ... sort of.

Anyway! You are a CROW TENGU, and the sole reporter, editor, and all-around owner of the BUNBUNMARU NEWSPAPER, which enjoys a modest popularity despite the fact that it consists almost entirely of EMBELLISHED FACTS, ENHANCED TRUTHS, and UNFLATTERING REMARKS. It is from this periodical which YUKARI derived your pseudonym of "BOON," which is pronounced almost exactly the same way as the first syllable. Your SPECIAL ABILITY is MANIPULATION OF WIND.

Your plans for today were to investigate TEAM , a gang of MISCREANT COMBATANTS which MIMA was joining. However, YUKARI abruptly decided she needed someone with a NICE TURN OF SPEED, and you are THE FASTEST. More to the point, MASHA had never encountered you before, and YUKARI just loves MYSTERIOUS BULLSHIT; your identity was withheld solely for the hell of it. That said, what with one thing and another, this MUSHROOM-GIRL is a much better SCOOP.

What will you do first?

Oh, and MASHA can still accept commands.

> Aya: Quickly retrieve arms from scarf.

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Ghoul

So what was the Significance of the extra 8 in Aya's KAWADEC number?

Ruki

> Masha: Retrieve the mask. Become the Ranger.

Anonymous

Aya: Take pictures of the contents of Mima's clothes.

teejeh

So Yukari only went for the English pun (Bunbunmaru) and not the Japanese pun (bun an aya being written with the same kanji, apparently)?

I stand by my previous nethack joke:
> i: Blind Mima with expensive camera.

So, I think that I've finally figured out Mima's interest in Masha. Clearly, Team ❽ has started up a totally legitimate business but lack an illegitimate business for which legitimate business will be the cover. Having been alerted by her connection with spirits to Masha's impending awakening, Mima came to the brilliant realization that she could get the impressionable new youkai to supply them with drugs. Of course, due to Gensokyo's notably lax (read: nonexistent) drug laws, this would in fact just be a second totally legitimate business but genius doesn't care about what the law does or doesn't say.

> Aya: Get a quote out of Mima for an article on Team ❽'s nefarious plans for Masha!
> Youmu: Suddenly get upset over an old argument.
> SHAMEIMARU!: Flashback to 500 years ago.

Re:2

Aya: Quickly retrieve arms from scarf.

Tewi Inonymous

Mima came to the brilliant realization that she could get the impressionable new youkai to supply them with drugs. Of course, due to Gensokyo's notably lax (read: nonexistent) drug laws, this would in fact just be a second totally legitimate business but genius doesn't care about what the law does or doesn't say.

;)
If this isn't the plot it should be.

>Aya: Try to interview Mima about the team 8 matter (Both distraction and goal)
Oh yeah do that ayayayaya

Formica Archonis

I stand by my previous nethack joke:
> i: Blind Mima with expensive camera.

My god, man, are you trying to get her eaten?

Nate

>Masha: Determine skill level

Player Three

@Muffin: If I knew what counted as Weird Postmodern Shit...

@Ghoul: 141.80. Anagram it and put in an extra 8, and you get "Boon's" number. This of course means Yukari haxed Aya another frequency, or she got an extra KAWADEC.

@teejeh: Knowing Yukari...it was both. Or at least both fed into her Insane Troll Logic.

>Masha: The mask beckons to you. You must take it.

Wolf

Well since this is Yukari we're talking about here and since Aya did save Masha I think this would mean that we might be able to unlock certain characters once Masha runs into them depending on if they don't want to fight her of course. I mean we managed to contorl a fairy for a breif moment here since Masha was nearby and didn't cause any hostilities to them... yet. Besides Muffin did state that we can now try and control Aya for now that is.

>Aya: Use your favorite quite once you've stalled Mima enough before you take her on.

>Masha: If you do run into that device again, try using one of your current Spell Cards on it just to be sure.

Hakurou Musha

> Aya: Attempt to interview. When Mima inevitably refuses, state you're just going to have to use certain quotes from Yukari and Rumia instead. Then strife.
> Masha: Go to the lake, as instructed. Find the only possible hiding spot for a bright red youkai.
> Meiling: zzzzzzz...

Nameless Fool

Harass Mima by taking pictures of her Shoot the Bullet/Double Spoiler style.

-ED

Ruki:

> Masha: Retrieve the mask. Become the Ranger.

Put aside the ranger. Become who you were born to be. Take the Dimholt Road.

Shinku Tsuki

Aya: Retrieve arms from tokin

Netto Takashi

> Aya: Retrieve arms faster than anyone else!

And now to exploit TVTropes' Touhou character listings, along with a few gaps in the list of no longer accessible characters to wreak havoc!

> Shingyoku: Switch genders
> YuugenMagan: Do something chaotic
> Elis: Turn into a bat
> Sariel: Kill something
> Kikuri: Spin
> Konngara: Pull your "horn" out
> Meira: Steal Hakurei powers
> Ellen: Do something cute
> Chiyuri/Yumemi: Explain comparative physics
> Elly: Inform Yuuka something weird is happening
> Mugetsu: Frolick
> Gengetsu: Initiate "Gengetsu Rape Time"
(etc.)

Zero-ELEC

Quickly retrieve arms from mask.

Paradoxical Frog

Netto, it wasn't a comprehensive list. Muffin cleared that up pages ago. (Though it would be cool if your commands could happen. Oh, and Elly was on the list, I checked.)

>Aya: Quickly retrieve arms from tokin, then kick Mima's... uh... wisp.

Mariku

...Wait, after reading the above, I realized there's nothing under Mima's dress for Aya to take a picture of.

...Other than a "Shrimp tempura-tail" article.

Emperor Dodd

Aya: The most quickly retrieve arms and legs from Mima

Sincere

I just want to say that the title Gonzo Reporter of Paradise is beautiful and oh, so fitting.

Kairose

Well, it's nice that we can control someone that's not Masha again. Though that fact defeats all the theories on what's been going on so far (well, the ones I read, at least). I'm just going to go with us having no clue what's going on in this incident until just before the end unless someone reads Muffin's mind.

And I usually think the 'Retrieve arms from ___' is overly silly, but in this case, I support:
Aya: Retrieve arms from Mima

Kimiko Muffin

It's simple, really. Before, we were controlling everyone through Masha, and the commands were actually in-character entities (like the Exiles' commands in Homestuck). Now, they're the same kind of "commands" as in any other game. Well ... most other games. This isn't the first storygame where "Voices In My Head" was a plot-point ...

(If any of you are wondering why I'm not doing my usual "be more vague than Yukari" bit, remember the Ferengi Rule of Acquisition #76: "Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies.")

Netto Takashi

@Paradoxical Frog (nice name BTW): I didn't read all the comments between there and here... <.<

Hmm, guess I'll have to try something else, then.

> Masha: Use Spore Sign "Mushroom Samba"
> Fairies: Fly to the right! There's candy there!

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