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Shenanigans in a Magical Forest

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Player Three

>Mushroom: Smugly regard network of fungal filaments underground, of which you are merely a reproducing "organ". Speaking of which, release the spores. Those dead trees aren't going to eat themselves, you know.

Yeah, I went there. Biology, in your Touhou.

Taoba

>Mushroom: Breathe. Or just wonder why you're being zoomed in. Either one's okay.

Stupid Little Drill Tank

>Mushroom: Become a mushroom man. Then dance.

Anonymous

Mushroom: Become the last hope of the Rebel Alliance.

Mushroom

Guys, stop pressuring me!

Formica Archonis

Mariku > Mushroom: Jump on an unsuspecting sucker's head, and cause them to walk in directions they don't wanna go in.
Stupid Little Drill Tank > Mushroom: Become a mushroom man. Then dance.

Aaaaand now Trauma's "I'm a Pumpkin Man" is going through my head with every "Pumpkin" replaced with "Mushroom".
( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MQOR3k72S34 Naughty words and low budget SFX ahead.)

Mushroom > Guys, stop pressuring me!

Mmmm, mushrooms pressed into a form and stuffed. Yum.

Wolf

Well if waiting around as a mushroom is too boring then let's try

Spirits> Try and see if we can become a pumkin instead.

I mean it's worth a shot.

teejeh

I'm slightly disturbed by the sheer volume of commands being issued to a mushroom (a mushroom!) that for all we know is actually incapable of action. This page could still turn out to be a red herring. For all we know, Yukari is about to show up, pick this mushroom, and use it to blow up Nitori.

OneSS

>Mushroom: Find that you are Nue Houjuu in disguise.

-ED

>Mushroom: Reveal that you are Kogasa Tatara, disguised by Nue Houjuu.

Hakurou Musha

Yukari doesn't need a mushroom to blow shit up. Besides, our purpose from here is obvious. We need to detonate in Reimu's face and perform the third biggest spell break in Gensokyan history. Can we affect the situation until then? Probably not. Will we keep trying? Of course. In fact, the less control we have, the more freedom we have to state complete nonsense, because we know it probably won't change a thing.

That said, there are still plenty of Chekhov's guns to be fired. I count at least five on our side...

Formica Archonis

Well, if we're gonna be silly and perhaps make obscure references....

Mushroom: Move to the Australian outback. At least there everything trying to kill you doesn't do it with danmaku.

Mushroom: Sell your tiny mushroom soul to Mephistopheles in the hopes of obtaining the love of the small girl who follows those two blondes around.

Mushroom: Develop dimensional gates in your side leading from Kensington Gardens in the future to the New Mexico desert, July 1945. Expect sundials and non-Euclidean pergolas.

Mushroom: You're lost in a dark wood. Meet the poet Virgil, travel through Hell, Purgatory, and Heaven, guided by Virgil and Beatrice, a pure green mushroom that died young after being shattered by Cirno.

Mushroom: Ask yourself if you wish to remain a pawn in the battles that rage around you. Defeat the Serpent Rider Korax, obtain his Chaos Sphere and be promoted to a queen, the reaches of the board suddenly within your grasp.

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